somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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