he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
