everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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