Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Found the puke drawer
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I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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