goodnight i made you a song goodbye
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
