dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
They have beer where we have blood.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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