you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
