She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Sacagawea was the original milf.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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