i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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