No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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