I met the friendliest cop last night
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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