I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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