do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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