I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
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hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
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i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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