your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
