She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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