youre lurking in front of me
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
