I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize