Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Do vagina's smell?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
