In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Randomize
