goodnight i made you a song goodbye
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
