Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
