The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize