shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.