he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
