Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
