This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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