she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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