I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
