yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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