that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
