butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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