he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
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I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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