READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
