Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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