Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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