The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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