all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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