I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
