Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
