My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize