My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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