She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
