I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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