brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
