i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
