idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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