Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
