dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Someone shattered a urinal.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I want her autograph on my taint
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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