halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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