She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
